Anger – What and Why: Part 1 by Leigh Martinuzzi
Anger; a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility, noun;
fill (someone) with anger; provoke anger in, verb.Anger is a powerful emotion triggered by how we feel based on the current state of our body, mind and environment. It is said to be a surface emotion which is perhaps due to the intensity of both the biological and physiological reactions that arise. Does anger serve a purpose? Could it be a beneficial emotion? Or is it wasteful, unnecessary and self-defeating?
I’ve never been an angry person however that may merely be a perspective based on how I feel anger shows up. I feel anger and have had many experiences in which I’ve allowed anger to take the best of me. However, overall, it is not something that I feel has a significant effect on my life. Perhaps it does. What I have learnt is that anger has multiple ways of expressing itself. More on this soon.
Like all emotions, anger is constructed. As Lisa Feldman Barrett explained to me is that emotions are not inherent parts of the human condition or brain that result in distinct reactions or “fingerprints” of emotion. We develop emotions in the experience of life. From years of sociocultural conditioning. It helps us understand why we all behave differently to the emotions we have.
When you think of anger, what comes to mind? For me, I see violence, hot temper and aggression. I don’t see pleasure or positive outcomes but purposeless energy. Perhaps you can relate. If we look at the source of anger, as per the above definition, we can understand that anger is a result of frustration, annoyance or displeasure.
Depending on the intensity, anger will cause an increased heart rate, blood pressure, adrenaline and other biological chemicals. An image comes to mind of a cartoon character turning bright red with steam billowing out of its ears. We may suppress anger or express it, in both healthy and unhealthy ways. How anger shows up in our lives and how well we control it is based on our tolerance levels. And tolerance is conditioned throughout our upbringing and heavily related to the state of our environment, body and mind.
If we have a self-need that we feel is not being met, consciously or subconsciously, frustration and annoyance may arise. How well we tolerate any imbalance in unmeet needs will affect how well we handle any subsequent anger that results. The question I had to ask is, does this serve a purpose? What I believe the answer to be is, absolutely, yes!
When a fundamental human need is not meet, biological and physiological reactions occur to assist as to bring balance. It is essential for our survival. If we didn’t have such results, perhaps we wouldn’t do what is necessary to course correct. Lack of action could, therefore, be detrimental to our survival.
My thought is that there are fundamental human needs like food, warmth, belongingness, among others, that must be meet. I also acknowledge that the novelties of modern society have developed a race of people that have a bunch of “superficial needs.”
I’d consider these as “confused expectations” that if without, would have no immediate effect on our survival. Like expecting the light to turn on, of the TV to work correctly. It may be that we hope that no one else will interrupt the pursuit of our desires. Being annoyed when we are cut off in traffic because we aim to arrive at work on time. Expecting that people will comment on how we’ve dressed or a Facebook post and then when we do not achieve the response we desire, tolerance weakens and anger arises.
Unnecessary needs based on an attachment to an expectation that serves no purpose or meaning to the course of our lives would be of little use to get upset about, but most of us do. Regardless of whether a need is deemed necessary or not, we know that if it is not meet that it will likely result in an emotional occurrence. It is the human condition and design. How we cope with our emotions will rely on how we’ve experienced them in the past and how we manage them moving forward. That is the What and the Why of anger.
One article suggests that we manage anger by expressing, suppressing or calming. In reading this research, I realised that I typically contain my rage. It may be because I see this emotion as a negative or sign of weakness that at all costs mustn’t be revealed. I think it is how our society and culture feel about anger. Others express it via aggression, violence or rage. Hot tempered and adrenaline pumped. Others have found practices to calm their frustrations. And not one of us is prone to anger.
Suppression of emotion isn’t healthy. Like furnace without a release valve, the pressure has no place to escape and will likely explode. As we will if how we feel is not being expressed. We should opt for sharing our frustration but not in unhealthy outbursts. It will not result in a positive outcome, and the same annoyance will likely repeat itself in the future. The best option is to express our anger armed with a tool belt of calmness.
How we do that? Well, that’s for the next post.
Further Reading and Resources
TED Talks: Ideas worth spreading
Elite Daily: The Voice of Generation Y
Four Hour Work Week: How to escape the 9-5, live anywhere and join the new rich.
The Minimalists: How to pursue a minimalist lifestyle and be happier.
Mind Hacks: Tips and Tricks for Using Your Brain
Rich Roll: Plantpowered Wellness Advocate
The Art of Charm: Build confidence, feel comfortable and networking differently.
The Art of Manliness: Encouraging men to be better husbands, fathers, brothers, citizens.
Tiny Buddha: Simple wisdom for complex lives.
Mind Body Green: Lifestyle media brand dedicated to inspiring you to live your best life.
Zen Habits: Find simplicity and mindfulness in life.
Creative NonFiction: “true stories well told.”
Barking Up the Wrong Tree: science-based answers and expert insight on how to be awesome at life.
The Positivity Blog: Practical articles on happiness, self-esteem, productivity and social skills.
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